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A guide to realizing if your child is at-risk, displaying self-destructive behaviors, and needs your help and intervention.
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Unclutter Your Life! by Stephanie Denton
Balancing Work and Family - Emotional Health - Three Resolutions
CLUTTER (n) Webster's Dictionary 1. a crowded or confused mass or collection; 2. interfering echoes visible on a radar screen caused by reflection from objects other than the target.
Someone mentions "clutter." Close your eyes. What do you see? If you're like most, the image closely reflects Webster's first definition. Clutter equals junk. It's stuff that's all mixed up. Although valid, this illustration is not complete, as it depicts only what clutter is without considering what it does. It portrays clutter as passive, without consequence. Yet clutter does have repercussions. It impacts your life. As articulated in Webster's latter definition, it interferes.
Clutter diminishes clarity. It occupies space, both physical and mental. It impedes movement and progress, and detracts from efficiency and effectiveness.
Getting rid of clutter is not about cleaning. It is about increasing focus and decreasing interference. Far from a low-level task best relegated to the night time janitorial crew, it is a process whose return on investment grows exponentially the more potential value you have to contribute.
So What Is and Isn't Clutter?
Clutter Is Unrelated Things Mixed Together
Clutter Is Things You Neither Need Nor Want
Clutter Is Things Left Out Because They're Unfinished
Clutter Is Things You Haven't Made a Decision About Yet
Where is your clutter? It may be anything from notes stuck to your computer monitor to the extra, ummm, you know, words you inject into conversations to the thoughts and worries buzzing about in your head. It may be in your memos, on your desk, in your computer or in the manner in which you structure your day. Whatever the area, uncluttering it positions you to soar.
NOW YOU'VE FOUND IT ... HOW DO YOU GET RID OF IT?
Since clutter can be physical and/or mental, these strategies are most effective when put to use in both venues.
Know What's Important
A mission statement, a strategic plan or simply knowing that you are going to keep only good photographs and pitch the blurry ones - any of these is a statement of what's important. Without such a statement, anything is potentially important.
Group Related Items Together
Get Rid of What You Don't Need or Want
If a bulky item holds a special memory for you, perhaps because your child created it, consider photographing it. You can preserve the memory without hanging onto it. Keeping something because you "paid good money for it"? Realize that it has served its purpose. After all, when you pay good money for an elegant meal, you don't expect to hold onto that forever. Don't forget that sometimes the garbage can you need is a mental one. So while you're uncluttering, get rid of "what if's" and "should's."
When you catch yourself thinking, "But I might need that someday," refer back to your statement of what's important. Remember, everything is potentially important, and if you keep everything you're going to need a warehouse. Rely on the instincts that led you to create your statement of importance.
Designate One Logical Place for Everything
Keep items in their designated home, no matter their stage of completion. Don't leave a project out just because you don't want to forget about it. Remind yourself of what needs to be done with a list system. Retrieve resources only when you are going to work with them.
Compartmentalize
Apply this concept to everything from your closet to your desk drawer to your computer files. Even use it for your to do list. Separate tasks from phone calls from outside errands to be run. These are distinctly different activities, most efficiently accomplished if batched together. When they are listed this way, you can quickly see all the tasks in each category.
It's always easier to find what you want if you only have to look in one compartment, as opposed to the entire space.
Uncluttering your life is a powerful experience. It creates space for you to transform data, information and opportunity into knowledge, wisdom and action.
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Benefits of Getting Rid of Clutter
PHYSICAL because you have more free space, and it's easier to find what you're looking for.
FINANCIAL because you zero in on targets, accomplishing what's important in less time. You don't purchase items you already own but forgot you had or couldn't find and you allocate fewer dollars to unnecessary storage.
EMOTIONAL because you have more energy and less stress and a reduction in the overwhelming feeling there's no time to do it all. When you are drowning in clutter, the cost to you and/or your company is great on many levels. Once clear, however, you can more easily access the resources, physical and mental, that you want or need at any given moment.
The key is to remember that it's only clutter if it interferes, and it only interferes if it's not where it's supposed to be.
Irene Lebedies Life & Family Coach 480-440-3242
Ask for the FOCUS Discount! If your child is showing signs of rebellion and many of the traditional solutions you have tried are not working, you can get help from coaching. Through weekly phone sessions and Irene's availability throughout the week by phone or email, you will find solutions and reach the desired outcome for you and your family.
The Shelter of Each Other: Rebuilding Our Families by Mary Pipher Families today are experiencing a new set of realities. Working parents are harried, tired, and overextended. They are unable to protect their children from the enemy within, the inappropriate television they watch for hours, the computer games that keep them from playing outside, the virtual reality they tune in to when they should be learning about the real world. And so, Pipher says, we have houses without walls. Compounding this is the fact that our psychological theories don't work anymore, because they were developed decades ago, when families were tightly knit, relatively monolithic institutions. Pipher offers ideas for simple actions we can all take to help rebuild our families and strengthen our communities.
How to Really Parent Your Teenager by Ross Campbell Dr. Campbell offers a guidebook of positive, proven strategies for real-world problems. Parents will learn how to spot depression and anticipate rebellion, how to discuss sexuality and keep anger in check, and most importantly, how to maintain communication and communicate love.
The Five Love Languages of Teenagers by Gary Chapman This book contains very practical guidance on how to express the teen's primary love language, how to teach them appropriate responsibility, and how to properly handle both parental and teen anger. It is a tangible resource for stemming the tide of violence, immorality, and despair engulfing many teens today.
Boundaries with Teens: When To Say Yes, How To Say No by John Townsend
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